The Shire, nr Oxford UK

4pm-ish
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Hi Reader,

Well, we’re back from our glorious short stay in the Peak District National Park. The picture above is the cottage where we stayed. The countryside was stunning. We went e-biking one day on a wondrous trail through tunnels and across viaducts, and up a cable car another day. Equally memorable were the warm meetings we had with people in the area.

In my post a couple of weeks ago, I mentioned a season of more freedom, more choice as to how I use my time. Initially I would generate my own busyness. This sparked fresh sources of self-made stress.
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I have been practicing an approach that seems to be a sustainable antidote for self-induced stress. I have been following this for some time now so that this approach feels positive in its effects upon me and I would like to share it with you and seems to be yielding some positive results.

I also referenced Cal Newport’s new book, Slow Productivity. Newport explored how modern knowledge work has often become toil without traction. A major source of this is the confusion of taking on many things. One of the emergent principles is his book is the simplicity of Do fewer things.

I have developed a habits-directed way to shape my day.

And it works.

It works without stress, whilst building those skills that are key to me…as long as I have the courage to abandon goal-driven deadlines.
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This is one instance of where the literature on personal agency, behavioural psychology and ancient spiritual traditions all agree. Here lie answers for us all to the question: How do I become a better me?

Explore with me the spiritual aspect first.

It is akin to what many spiritual apprentices call a Rule of Life. A Rule of Life is a framework that guides the individual in their spiritual journey. It emphasises a pattern of living rooted in faith and values.
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It is not, or should not become a set of restrictive and onerous self-imposed laws. In truth, the term Rule of Life can put off many of us. It seems like an invitation to submit to some legalistic lifestyle.
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Rather, the Rule of Life should be seen more as a set of daily prompts that support the building of a living, authentic and effective life for God.

The practice originated in the early monastic movements led by the Desert Fathers and St Benedict.

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So now let’s turn to behavioural psychology.

Some of the most powerful ideas in recent years have been around how to shape ourselves around key routines that form into non-conscious habits, behaviours that soon require negligible willpower and how some joy and reward within them.

As part of my Unburdened Life coaching product, I introduce people to a simple tool called the Habits Tracker. Often, my Habits Tracker shapes most of my day. It gives me a meaningful structure and accountability to myself, so that I cover off all the important things. As I do this, again it requires very little mental or emotional effort to organise my time.

For example, reading is a vital practice for someone like me who writes. Reading is research and so stimulates my writing and calls me to write better. On my habits tracker, I set myself to read only one chapter a day as a minimum target. Most days, I will exceed this, which encourages me.

So too with my writing: my current target is only 100 words per day. Not a lot, you might think, but that is all I commit to achieve as a minimum… and usually I delight myself as I flow past that measure by some distance.

And so, by committing to these daily practices, or rules, which are rooted in my life values, my skills build. As many say, it focuses each of us on the process rather than striving for some goal.

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But, of course, these habits are not randomly chosen. In the Unburdened Life we clarify what is essential to us and what is not.

And then by reviewing my Habits Tracker at the end of each day, I realise I have taken action. I am the agent of my own improvement. I am intentionally shaping my own life.
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Let me end with these words of a wise woman:

Yours

Patrick

P.S. I feel confident that am becoming a better version of myself by using these deceptively simple tools.
How about you? Are you stuck in some way? Frustrated by lack of progress or stressed?
If so, I invite you to book a 30-minute discovery call with me. We can discuss what is stopping you and how I might help.

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